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Saturday, 2 February 2013

Saturday Night Blogging (part 2)

Part 1 closely followed by part 2. This is a story that has been edited a couple of times, various bits added and subtracted until I was happy with the end product because when I looked at it until that last time it just felt it wasn't right.

I felt after what I've been doing and talking about today that two examples of different ways I write, the first totally unplanned, unedited, uncut, this was submitted to a short story thread on a writing website after it had been edited a couple of times were appropriate for me to share.

Now a little of the back story of Gabriel and Susie's reality has changed since I finished this story, but I haven't edited that because it's fiction and fiction is fluid, when it get's published in a book then it'll get fixed, but now it's just this a case of this is something I've written, enjoy it and let me know what you think, this story is only about a thousand words.

Fury of the Ages

 

 

Gabriel of Alba’s fist met flesh and the Sorceror rocked back. The Gabriel grabbed his opponent by his collar and landed a headbutt upon the foul dark magic user’s nose. Blood and cartiledge exploded from and he ducked down. The War Master of the Magi’s free fist met the recidivist’s neck and smashed his spine.

His partner Susie Owens, Wizard of the Sydrian School, fought her opponenets Magic for Magic, shields being pummled with spell after spell. She faced three Priory members at once and was just about holding her own, when a lightning bolt shot from Gabriel’s hand and exploded two of the dark magic shields.

His own shield was being peppered with spells as he stalked towards the Mistress of the Priory, her people and the Daemon’s that they had conjured using the life force of a Magi child protecting her like a living shield.

He caught two of the Priory by their coat tails as they tried to flee from him, his own hand wreathed in flames and sparks igniting the cotton of the men’s coats. He knocked the men clean out so they were incinerated by the flames enveloping them.

Gabriel refused to allow the remaining children of his people to die at the hands of these soulless wretches share that first boy’s fate. Lightning bolts and fireballs flew from his hand as Priory member after Priory member fell to his fury.

The Mistress saw the fire in his eyes, white hot and filled with the fury of the light. She directed the half-ton eight foot, almost reptilian, Cordisangui daemons to either kill him or at least weaken the furious War Master.

A feral roar issued from his mouth, almost like the roar of a lion, as a double headed axe, wreathed in white flame appeared in his hand, for him to swing at the first Daemon that came into reach.

He bisected the daemon, groin to head, and then sliced the next in two, he beheaded a third and transected a fourth, each with a single stroke of the weapon.

“I am Gabriel, Son of Galdanis and Shiona, War Master and Warrior of the People. I am Death Incarnate.” He bellowed at the top of his lungs in the Warrior tongue of the Magi

His axe clove left and right, taking arms, legs and heads from human and Daemon alike. Susie had dispatched the last of the three Priory members in her path to the children, slamming him into a wall with a sickening thump. She unshackled them, but they all stared in awe of the de facto leader of their people.

The Magi War Master was like an engine who wouldn’t stop. Lightening bolts, fireballs and shards of ice flew from his free hand as the axe took apart yet more of the Priory.

He reached the Priory mistress and grabbed her by the throat, his eyes had changed into those of pure white light, and his accent was no longer that of a man born and bred in Glasgow, she had never heard the accent before.

“I am here to serve justice for the life you have taken and those that you would end.” He told the Priory Mistress who’s eyes were full of fear. “I name thee Omnino diabolus incarnatus inredux by the ancient laws of the Magical world, I cast your rotten soul back to your Dark Masters in hell.”

With a single twinge of his wrist he snapped her neck and threw her lifeless corpse to the ground, then launched the axe with eery accuracy so it decapitated the last of the remaining Cordisangui daemons.

His hands dropped, along with his head, then were lifted up to the sky and a bolt of lightning struck him. Using his body as a conduit it began forking into every living member of the Priory, electrocuting them on the spot.

Another roar issued from his open maw, the power surged through the body of the War Master and it would be awe inspiring if Susie wasn’t sure that he was no longer in control of it. She ducked and dived in order to avoid the forks as they continued to keep aloft the desiccated and charred remains of the Priory.

She reached him and tried to shake him to awareness.

“Gabriel, stop it you are going to die if you don’t stop it.” She said, almost crying at him, she realised she wasn’t getting through with his own name. “Michael, Stephen, Liam, Angus, Shaemus…”

She continued on using the names of his ancestors until she reached back almost a million years. His eyes returned to their normal colour.

“How long?” Gabriel asked her, sagging and almost falling to his knees, his voice back to normal. “How long Susie?”

“Almost before Pythia.” She replied with a concerned look on her face. “It’s getting worse Gabriel, I don’t know if I can pull you back if you push before Pythia.”

“Don’t worry,” he said with a tight smile. “You will, at least the children are safe.”

“You are far too important to let yourself lose control like that. You must not let it happen again, you are magic’s future.” She said with a wet growl, she was almost sobbing.

“No, my dearest friend Susie,” he replied with a smile, holding her tightly, and pointing to the children. “They are the future of magic, I am but a conduit for that future to spring forth and I always was.”

“They Prophecies…” He interupted her with a hand.

“The Prophecies are vague and inexact, in due time I will fulfil them and you will see just how vague.” He let her go and walked towards the children. “Come let’s return these lucky ones to their parents and break the news to the ones who are lost, may they rest in the embrace of the Great Father and Mother until it is their time to walk the world again.”

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